The one thing I really dislike about me is the way I just keep so much anger in myself, the way I get so emotionally involved in things so easily, and the worst is how memories aren't so easily forgotten. Right now, I'm angry at how things are now between a friend of mine and me. Angry at what has become of us, and how we'll never go back to the way we were again.
I still look out the window, and look for you every night. Knowing that that day will never come again. That day where smiles and tears were so common and we knew everything about each other.
No, that day will never repeat itself.
I even hold on to every fragment of memory I have of you although I try so hard to forget them. I can never forget the way you made me laugh and how we cried that night.
I know I sound so extremely pathetic, but that just shows how vulnerable I am to all this mess.
It doesn't help to have something reminding me of you wherever I go, including the weather.
Especially whenever it rains. Whenever the raindrops fall and hit the ground with such intensity that it deafens our ears and makes the world around us a blur.
Who am I kidding. I need more time to forget about all this. More time, more determination.
Still, a part of me wonders if you feel the way I do. A nagging awkward feeling, especially when a conversation never seems to end properly, and we actually never stop talking.
